Two Paths Through Education

My brother and I started in the same family, but we found success by taking very different routes.

When you are young, adults often ask, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” It can sound as if you are supposed to know the answer already. I did not. My brother Marty seemed to know his direction much earlier than I did, and for a while I could have mistaken that difference for failure. Looking back, I learned something more useful: a good education does not always follow one straight road.

Where Our Story Began

My childhood changed before I was old enough to make sense of it. In 1953, after our mother died and our father lost his parental rights following an alcohol-related automobile accident, four of our aunts took in six children. Two of those women were Anne Bonner and her sister Rose. I lost Rose in 1964, and seven months later, on Christmas Day, I lost my beloved Aunt Anne.

The neighborhood was rural, and there were not many other children nearby. Marty became my best friend. We acted out television adventures such as Spin and Marty and The Lone Ranger and Tonto. We could spend hours throwing a baseball back and forth on our cinder driveway. Years later, when Marty visited me in Delaware, the memories returned. We still remembered many of the same moments, and being together felt easy and familiar.

Marty Chose a Clear Academic Route

Marty had a brilliant mind and understood early that a university degree was the right path for him. He earned a bachelor’s degree in nuclear physics. He also joined the Reserve Officers’ Training Corps, better known as ROTC. That decision helped with the cost of college and opened opportunities in the Air Force. He later continued his education and earned his Ph.D.

His path made sense for his interests, abilities, and goals. He knew what he wanted to study and found a practical way to help pay for it. That combination gave him a strong start.

I Needed a Different Route

I entered the University of Delaware without a clear destination. I began by studying biology in the College of Arts and Sciences, then changed my major to business. After three years, I was deeply in debt and under a great deal of stress. I was working toward a degree, but I still did not have a clear picture of where it would lead.

My brother Michael was already a journeyman electrician. During a telephone conversation, he suggested that I join his union, earn good money, and ease the pressure I had been carrying. I followed his advice, with Michael as my guide.

Becoming an electrician was an education of its own. The apprenticeship required four years of classroom study and 8,000 hours of training on the job. I learned by studying and by doing real work alongside experienced people. Once I completed that training, I returned to the university and finished my degree.

The Hybrid Path Worked for Me

Combining skilled-trade training with a university education gave me stability and opened possibilities that I might not have found by choosing only one route. It also helped me understand how I learn best. I needed practical experience as well as classroom study.

Your route may look different from mine or Marty’s. You might attend a four-year university, begin at a community college, enter an apprenticeship, join the military, or combine more than one option. Community college can provide a strong start at a lower cost. An apprenticeship can lead to paid work while you learn. A university may be the best choice when your goal requires a particular degree. Each option has benefits, costs, and commitments that deserve careful thought.

A university may be the best choice when your goal requires a particular degree. Each option has benefits, costs, and commitments that deserve careful thought.

What You Can Do Now

At ages 12 to 17, you do not need to design your entire life. You can begin by noticing what holds your attention, how you like to learn, and what kinds of problems you enjoy solving. Ask people about the work they actually do. Talk with your family, teachers, counselors, and people who have followed different educational paths. Ask about cost, training time, daily work, and future choices.

Most of all, do not assume that someone else’s clear plan means you are behind. Marty and I grew up together, but our strengths led us in different directions. His direct academic path worked for him. My hybrid path worked for me. The important question is not whether your path looks impressive from the outside. It is whether the next step helps you learn, grow, and build a life that fits you.